1. Yes, your life seems “unsettled,” but we also do not know when the Lord Jesus will return and that should concern us far more. What are we doing today to prepare for the marriage supper with the Lamb as opposed to trying to get a date so we won’t be alone for the holidays? Jesus told His followers He would return and we are to be ready and watchful (Matthew 24:42). What can you do to prepare for that?
2. To the tough single Women: As a single woman, especially as a single mom, you probably have to be pretty tough. You’ve had to clean out gutters, shovel driveways, work hard to make ends meet, and tuck your kids in each night by yourself. That’s no small thing. It takes a tough strong woman to do all that. While God is your man, you’ve often felt alone in the journey and have likely comforted yourself through it by saying things like, “I don’t need a man because…” To you tough women, take a deep breath. God has been showing me that while that toughness was essential for survival, He desires to restore your softness. Yes, you can do it all on your own, with God alone as your helper. But you don’t have to do that forever. God might have someone ready to step into your life to be your hero. Don’t act too much like you don’t need him. Make a list of areas where it would be nice to have a man in your life. Now I don’t suggest you advertise said list, but if God so leads, present the need to a man and see if he rises to the challenge. Do not demand, but offer the opportunity. Confession: when I felt the Lord lead me in this area, I said, “God, I think I’d rather stay single the rest of my life.” Be vulnerable? To a man? Risk hurt? Pain? I suggest this through much prayer. Stop doing a man’s job and give the men room to be men, rescuing the women. Let him be your hero, as Enrique used to sing “I can be your hero, Baby!” That reminds me…
3. Hero. Ladies, you don’t want a man you have to rescue. You need a man to rescue you! So stop trying to rescue men. Stop showing them how awesome you are. If they can’t figure that out for themselves, they’re not worth your time. You need a hero, as Bonnie Taylor used to sing, “I need a hero!” The Bible says husbands ought to lay down their lives for their wives (Ephesians 5:25). Sweeties, if he ain’t doing that, he ain’t the dude for you! You need a man willing to put you first daily, a hero! Not a perfect man, but at least a willing one, following God who’s trying to do as the Bible says. Hold out for that!
4. It could be worse. There is something worse than being alone and single. It’s called being in the wrong relationship. While that’s not a call to give up if you’re in a relationship. All good things require work. That’s between you and the Lord. But the last thing you want is someone who looks good on a Christmas card but belittles you in real life. “The most unhappy people in the world aren’t single, but are in marriages that are unequally yoked” (Professor McCord of Moody). JD Greare has said something similar. Trust God to be your man until He provides a man. Let your lack be an opportunity for God to provide through Himself and His people. Lean on Him in your loneliness. Go to Him in your darkest hour.
5. Remember that God can change anything in an instant. We often remember that fact to keep us humble. God gives and takes away. All that we have is His. But He can also change things for our good in an instant. Instead of thinking of “another holiday season as a single person,” realize that it might be your last holiday season with more time as a single person. I know multiple people who are in a different relational status this year than last. One is married now who was single a year ago. Another is single who was nearly engaged a year ago. Another engaged who was single and on and on. Many I know, are single again, and they have been on my heart.
6. Pray for others in your situation. As you feel tempted to feel sorry for yourself, use that time as an opportunity to pray for someone else struggling as well, as Dr. Bill Thrasher has often encouraged people. Maybe even reach out to others in your situation and as iron sharpens iron, encourage one another in the Lord (Proverbs 27:17).

Above all Friends, stand firm, knowing you’re not alone. God is with you always, to the end of the age (Matthew 28:20). I have many single friends who I have been praying for lately. God has given me the above reminders I’ve been passing on to them.